17)

Sitting waiting for the string orchestra to finish up so I can hear a feedback of some diatonic form of my piece. Hopefully this is not the end of my experience with this piece. I hope for much more, but my waiting is leaving me with a desire to know. I am never sure of what to think when I am faced with my music. Typically I just phase out to listen, but I am starting to become more engaged and directive up until it is ready for a somewhat passable performance.

This time I don't know. I know it won't sound perfectly in pitch, but I hope that at least the 1st violinist knows what he (or she) is doing. My hope lies in my ear being able to determine if the piece works or not.

My experience with music is beginning to become clearer, but more individualistically experienced. I am not sure what I think of this. The majority of the majors here are either crass or don't know what to put down. Maybe the other (which I have not mentioned yet) holds the future to a future collaborator. I cannot make music by myself: it is influence by those around me, no matter how hard I try not to let that happen.

And still I wait. Time will tell the future, as it will tell my music.

Futhon